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Todd Snider
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Ballad of the Kingsmen
The Kingsmen came together in a garage
they could hardly even play
but
they practiced night and day
and pretty soon they got to where they could really play
that song 'Louie, Louie'
so
they saved up all the money from the shows
went in to one of them studios
and gave their version of the song a try
now
I don't know the words to that song 'Louie, Louie'
and I'm pretty sure the singer for the Kingsmen didn't know 'em either
if he did know 'em, he didn't get 'em right on the record
'cause on the record they sound jumbled in his jaw
it says, 'me think of me girl oh so constantly
ahmayaaah makaaaah aahh ooohoooh aaaaah'
well
that last part scared everybody from the PTA to the FBI
you see
the kids had been going kind of crazy lately
and it seemed like nobody could figure out why
so
they decided to form a coalition, launch an investigation
you know, for the children,
they at least had to try
to figure out the words
to 'Louie, Louie'
it's the feel good hit of this endless summer
it gets these kids out of control
singin' along to that star spangled bummer
hail, hail, rock and roll
Marilyn Manson's real name isn't even Marilyn Manson
he's a skinny public high school kid from Florida
not some monster from out of this world
and like of a lot other skinny long haired public high school kids
he was sick of getting beaten up by the pulling guard all week
only to go out on the weekend and watch the quarterback get all the girls
so
he formed a bandman,
now he gets all the girls
a few years later a couple of latchkey kids go tragically mad
and everybody's standing around the television store at the mall
trying to figure out what went wrong
this guy says, 'you think the life of a kid going to high school could've gotten so bad?'
this other guy says, 'nah, it's just the words to one of them goddamn Marilyn Manson songs...
you know the one...'
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it's the feel good hit of this endless summer
it gets these kids out of control
singin' along to that star spangled bummer
hail, hail, rock and roll
you know
every ten years or so
our country and some other little country
we start firing all our newest weapons at each other
for some reason or another
right or wrong
like it or not
it happens
and when it happens people get shot
and when people get shot
they show it on tv a lot
every night at six o clock
and you don't even have to be eighteen to see it
you don't even have to be in first grade
first grade where they teach the kid pride
they tell him he'll need to thrive
in a world where they say only the strong will survive
so he's taught the art of more
to compare to
and to keep score
Monday thru Friday
while he stares at the floor
til' Sunday
they make him go to school once more
only this time they make him wear a suit and a tie
and listen to some guy who claims to know where people go when they die
tell him that only the meek are gonna inherit the earth
well, shit
by this time
the kid doesn't know what anything's worth
now
brothers and sisters I am only one guy
and I don't even know the words to that song 'Louie, Louie'
but I can tell you right now
without batting an eye
that the next time some latchkey kid goes wrong
it ain't gonna be 'cause that Eminem gets to say the word 'fag' in his song
and I'm not trying to preach to ya either
I'm just trying to sing to ya too
you know
string a few words together
hey kids...
lets get it on
lets get it on
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