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Bart Baker
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Shape of You Parody
The club isn't the best place to a stalk a lover
So the gym is where I go.
That's when I spy on you when you box,
I pretend I box also.
I've got a weird obsession with the shape of your body,
This creepy song is all about that,
Like your hands nose, the shape of your ears hips and throat and the shape of your mouth.
And I'm singing like,
What size are your boxing gloves?
Show me your hand shape,
Hold on what excuse me?
Come on now just let me see,
I may be crazy don't mind me,
Say boy your head is messed up,
Don't touch my waist,
Why are you measuring me?
Because I love your body,
Um OMG you are a freak!
I'm in love with the shape of you,
I made a body diagram too.
Your stomach is real flat and smooth,
And your butt is round and bubbly.
Last night I was in your room,
And I stole this red bra for you,
That's when I figured out the shape of your boobs,
Can I measure your inseam?
Weirdo, weirdo, weirdo, weirdo!
You're obsessed with my body!
Don't go, don't go, don't go, don't go!
What shape are your nipples please?
One week in and you came back to the gym, was glad to see your body,
Watching from the distance so you wouldn't see me,
It was like we were on our second date.
I watched for hours and hours,
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Even when you took a shower,
Making mental pics of all of your shapes.
I left a note in your locker,
Signed your body stalker,
Let's both get naked,
What do you say?
And now you're singing like,
Weirdo do you even box?
Or do you come to this gym to stalk me?
And inspect my body?
God damn it stop measuring me!
Oh girl yes of course I box,
Ok then prove it throw a left hook at me!
Can I first measure your feet?
Wait hold on are those my panties?
I stole it from the locker room,
Ok this has to end right now dude,
I'm getting in that ring with you,
I'm gonna beat your body!
Objectifiying girls is rude,
We have personalities to!
We're more than just hot bodies,
Show me your boobs,
I'm in love with your body.
Why are you such a psychopath?
I'm in love with your body.
Look I even made a butt graph,
It's shaping up quite nicely,
I'm gonna knock your teeth out man!
This is making me horny,
Can I please cover all your shapes with this lube?
Here's two shapes I got just for you!
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