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Ray Stevens
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Mississippi Squirrel Revival (1985)
Well when I was a kid I'd take a trip every summer down to Mississippi
To visit my granny and her antebellum world
I'd run barefooted all day long climbing trees free as a song
One day I happened to catch myself a squirrel
Well I stuffed him down in an old shoebox and punched a couple of holes in the top
And when Sunday came I snuck him into church
I was sitting way back in the very last pew showing him to my good buddy Hugh
When that squirrel got loose and went totally berserk
Well what happened next is hard to tell some thought it was Heaven others thought it was Hell
But the fact that something was among us was plain to see
As the choir sang, 'I surrender all' the squirrel ran up Harve Newman's cover-alls
And Harve leaped to his feet and said something's got a hold on me YEOW
The day the squirrel went berserk in the First Self Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumping pews and shouting hallelujah (hallelujah)
Well Harve hit the aisles a-dancing and screaming
Some thought he had religion others thought he had a demon
And Harve thought he had a weed eater loose in his fruit of the looms
He fell to his knees to plead and beg and the squirrel ran out of his britches leg
Unobserved to the other side of the room
All the way down to the Amen pew where sat Sister Bertha-Better-Than-You
Who'd been watching all the commotion with sadistic glee?
Well you should have seen the look in her eyes
When that squirrel jumped her garters and crossed her thighs
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She jumped to her feet and said Lord have mercy on me
As the squirrel made laps inside her dress she began to cry and then to confess
To sins that would make a sailor blush with shame
She told of gossip and church dissention but the thing that got the most attention
Was when she talked about her love life and then she started naming names
The day the squirrel went berserk in the First Self Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumping pews and shouting hallelujah (hallelujah)
Well seven deacons and the pastor got saved and twenty five thousand dollars got raised
And fifty volunteered for missions in the Congo on the spot
And even without an invitation there were at least five hundred re-dedications
And we all got re-baptized whether we needed it or not
Now you've heard the Bible story I guess how he parted the waters for Moses to pass
Oh the miracles God has wrought in this old world
But the one I'll remember till my dying day is how he put that church back on the narrow way
With a half crazed Mississippi squirrel
The day the squirrel went berserk in the First Self Righteous Church
In that sleepy little town of Pascagoula (Pascagoula)
It was a fight for survival that broke out in revival
They were jumping pews and shouting hallelujah (hallelujah)
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