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The Houghton Weavers
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Murphy and the Bricks
Dear sir i write this note to you to tell you of my plate,
for at the time of writing it, i'm not a pretty site.
me body is all black and blue, my face a deathly grey,
and i write this note to say, why i am not at work today.
Whilst working on the 14 floors some bricks i had to clear,
but to toss them down from such a height was not a good idea.
the foreman wasn't very pleased; he is an awkward sod,
and he said i had to cart them down the ladders in me hodder.
Now moving all these bricks by hand it was so very slow,
so i hoisted up a barrow and secured the rope below,
but in my haste to do the job i was to blind to see,
that a barrow full of building bricks was heavier than me.
And so when i untied the rope; the barrow fell like lead,
but clinging tightly to the rope, i started up instead,
i shot up like a rocket, till to my dismay i found,
that halfway up i met, the bloody barrow coming down.
The barrow broke me shoulder, as to the ground it sped,
and when i reached the top i banged the pulley with me head.
still clinging tightly to the rope from this almighty blow,
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while the barrow spilt out half its bricks on 14 floors below.
Now when these bricks had fallen, from the barrow to the floor,
i then outweighed the barrow and so started down once more,
still clinging tightly to the rope, me body racked with pain,
and halfway down i met, the bloody barrow once again.
The force of this collision, halfway down the office block,
caused multiple abrasions and a nasty case of shock,
still clinging tightly to the rope, i fell towards the ground,
and landed on the broken bricks the barrow had scattered round.
I lay there groaning on the ground; i thought i'd past the worst,
when the barrow hit the pulley wheel and then the bottom burst,
a shower of bricks rained down on me, i didn't have a hope,
as i lay there bleeding on the ground i let go of the bloody rope.
The barrow now being heavier, it started down once more,
and landed right across me as i lay there on the floor,
it broke 3 ribs and my left arm and i can only say….
i hope you'll understand why i am not at work today.
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