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King Fantastic
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Guide to Safely Petting Cougars
She was forty-five years and super
Met her at the Hollywood Ball, my seats were super
Be very, very, quiet; Reese is hunting cougar
Pinot Grigio, to the ho I maneuver (Yo!)
'My name's Mauricio, and to tell the truth
I should have practiced what the fuck I was gon' say to you'
And we she laughed, her tits bounced up and down
And that sundress, please undress
I'm hooked on Miss Blank-Blank
From the class of '84 though (What you know about that?)
She got grandkids too (What you know about that?)
We shot the shit for another quick bit
When you get a few ticks, give a young man a hick
She was a dime, back in '99
Now she ain't quite that, but the bitch is still fine
And when I get her on her spine
She slow-fucks to sleep, that makes your nigga weep (Yeah!)
I'd rather fuck with your moms
Because she's past being silly, and her pussy's the bomb
And I remind her of your daddy
That remind her of her twenties and a time when she was happy
She's always upbeat
And it's always her treat
Nigga, cheers to your momma (Hey!)
X4
She respects a real nig
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And when you move out the house, we gon' do it real big
We gon' gut your whole room
We gon' put mirrors on the ceiling
We gon' fuck and do shrooms
She don't go to Coachella
She is more purple rain than she is Rockafeller
My little soccer mamasita
Married a milf, all pleasure and no guilt
My brand new lady friend, she stay in the pocket
She ain't a fucking scatterbrain, she be on the topic
She's from another time and space
She has been around the block and you can see it on her face
She was a dime, back in '99
Now she ain't quite that, but the bitch is still fine
And when I get her on her spine
She slow-fucks to sleep, that makes your nigga weep (Yeah!)
I'd rather fuck with your moms
Because she's past being silly, and her pussy's the bomb
And I remind her of your daddy
That remind her of her twenties and a time when she was happy
She's always upbeat
And it's always her treat
Nigga, cheers to your momma (Hey!)
X4
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